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Saturday, August 15, 2020

Pandemic Diaries: Too Many Deaths

This pandemic has been heartbreaking. So many people have been infected by the virus. So many people are still suffering from it and so many people have died from it. There are also those who have died from non-COVID related causes, but because our hospitals are overwhelmed as it is, they have also been affected by this pandemic.

I have an aunt who was suffering from cancer who had been fighting the good fight but died during this pandemic. I have had friends who have lost their parents, uncles, cousins, husbands…people who were close to them. People that they loved. People that they never imagined they would lose this year and that they would lose them so fast and in the way that they did. 

Image by Stefan Keller from Pixabay

One thing that people have been critical about when it comes to the government is about how they are telling people not to worry about the figures. It is one thing to give facts and figures and statistics, but it is another thing to be affected by what is happening. To face the reality of the deaths because of this pandemic. 

Yes, statistics may say it is not as bad as we think, but the fact remains that people have died. People we know. People who are close to people that we know. It is just hitting too close to home. It is scaring people. I know that it is scaring me. I guess what I am saying is that maybe a little bit of compassion should be used when it comes to talking about these figures. I am sure that people mean well when they say it is not that bad (so that people would not worry too much I suppose), but it is still people we are talking about. People who were loved, who are missed. They are not just statistics but people who have left loved ones behind grieving for their loss.

I am thankful that me and my immediate family are OK. But I cannot help but be constantly in fear since it seems that more and more people are getting infected by the virus as time goes on. Given my health conditions, I am at risk. Given my mother’s age, she is also at risk. It feels like everyday I am worrying about how we will survive all this. I do not want to die. I do not want anyone in my family to die. Not during this pandemic. Not this way.

I do not know what else I can do to be honest. We make sure to have a supply of alcohol so that we can constantly disinfect if we cannot wash our hands right away. We wash our hands often. We disinfect with UV light. We do our best to get some sun and to stay healthy. We avoid going out as much as we can, although this cannot be avoided as we do have to work, and we do have to get our supplies. 

It feels like every day is like waiting for the other shoe to drop but hoping it that it never does. Does that even make sense? I know that a cure or a vaccine is still a long way away but without it I feel like every single day is another opportunity to make me worry and get stressed about this pandemic. Every day we read about more and more people getting infected and more people dying. 

If we cannot stop people from getting infected, can we at least help to stop people from dying and being severely affected by this virus? Please? This is all too much!

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